专辑简介

There's a subject not often discussed, and it's about time we handled it once and for all. We've received literally dozens of letters (as in alphabetical letters comprising exactly one email) about whether or not The Bearded Man has tips on how to maintain proper facial hair. Whether you've got a goatee, mutton chops, a five o'clock shadow, or the beginner's fuzz characteristic of an adolescent, there's probably more you can be doing to keep those bristles in check. If you are primarily an aquatic creature, for example, he suggests befriending any number of small grooming fish. In exchange for protection, these fish will also be happy to clean any wayward bacteria from your beard as well. If, on the other hand, you find yourself in the Australian outback, you need only find a friendly group of Aboriginals to assist you with the task. In outer space? Never fear! Today's modern space ships all come equipped with both razors and shaving cream, so it's hardly even a concern any more. There is, however, one perfect storm to avoid: never ever ever attempt to groom your beard while under the influence -- best case, you'll mess it all up. Worst case? You'll shave it all off. And we can't have *that* now can we??