Written, Produced, and Performed by Devin Sinha Featuring Austin Quick on keyboard on tracks 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, and 15 Mixed by Devin Sinha Mastered by Devin Sinha and Caleb Roman Track 01: Poem I: The Train I am an empty train blowing its whistle as it comes through town,        You are the silent night that drinks in the noise and says nothing. I sound the call for the words that fall inarticulately from my chapped mouth, sore from pressing my lips together saying please, one more round. One more round and one more shot for me because we drained the bottle on we while you were thinking "What's best for 'me'" and I was thinking "When did you and me become we and then you once more?" I am the wheels pushing against the iron rails with immutable inertia. Because the track only goes one way and if I stay, there's no getting started again. But the killing joke is that I'm on the slope and going down anyway. No, not in flame and not in blame but into a valley I haven't seen for a long time, filled with doubt, ambivalence, malaise and longing for the days when this was not the answer. So I feel lost -- and filled with worry -- that perhaps I am the end of my own journey. We are the distance between two points that nullifies when we're together, My dreams and ambitions drew that line between us with a suitcase and a plane ticket -- a tear and a kiss -- and words like "I miss you"  when what I meant to say was "Please don't forget me tomorrow." I am the half remembered song that would play every morning,        You are the harmony that made the melody beautiful. Where are the dreams we were promised? Track 02: A Song In The Dark I woke up this morning, went out in the rain past the man selling papers to the old eastbound train. All that I saw when I came home was another day gone and a man all alone in the mirror, when I look up for the light in my eyes that each day's growin' dimmer, and I'm not surprised. I heard you'd been roamin' all over the states, never settling down or stayin' in one place. I thought about calling, or maybe that I'd write, but the friend I remembered who once was a light in the part of my heart, where I needed it most, is just a song in the dark and her face is a ghost in my mind. I laid down beside you some eighteen months past. "Will you feel as I'm feeling?" was the question unasked. You couldn't see me for the stars in our eyes. As we folded together I could feel your heart rising and fall, as I matched it keeping pace every beat. Never felt so much sadness, never tasted so sweet. Track 3: November Passing She said it was a tough year There wasn't more to say We stayed and watched the sunset before we left his grave Love me like a brother or treat me like a friend Take me for your lover but know me in the end They loved him for his failure They paid him for his time You said he left a stranger He was a friend of mine Take me to the water Wash me in the sea As autumn finds the winter remain a friend to me She said it was a tough year There wasn't more to say We turned and left each other the flowers on his grave Track 04: Song For Past Loves You told me on the phone it wasn't just Paris You told me to my face I'm not the one you cherish anymore You told me it's too late, we shouldn't get started You told me once I shut folks out I always get so hard hearted You called my bluff I was always so tough on you I held you above the crowd I held my hopes on you You told me I was always good 'bout showin' how I loved you You told me wishin' hard don't always make it true You told me you wanted to be important in my life You told me someone else would make a better wife You called my bluff I was always so tough on you I held you above the crowd I held my hopes on you We bring back, bring back what we find to see us through Bring me back, bring me back to you You told me now you couldn't be with me You told me someday that you might want to be You told me once I felt like family You told me now that I would never be You called my bluff I was always so tough on you I held you above the crowd I held my hopes on you Track 05: When We Sleep I'd never considered myself to be lonely 'til you came along my way, saw what I had been missing Now that I know you, I can only feel sorry for all the years wasted without you here by me You dance in the daytime to all your favorite songs At the foot of our bed, tell me stories so long Going out in the evening, counting stars in the sky Your eyes in the moonlight make me feel so sublime And when we sleep it's not alone We're not alone any longer dear And when I wake with you beside me I feel whole I feel home When clouds blanket the heavens, can't see in front of our faces Making love in the dark, our souls, our oasis In the late summer grass, lie close in the pitch black Rest your head on my shoulder with my hand on your back And when we sleep it's not alone We're not alone any longer dear And when I wake with you beside me I feel whole I feel home I drink up our moments, keep them locked in my mind When the days hit me hardest and I'm falling behind When the world seems its worst, and I'm feeling confined And reasons to have faith become so hard to find You bring me back to earth Hold my hand to remind Love makes life worth living With our fingers entwined And when we sleep it's not alone We're not alone any longer dear And when I wake with you beside me I feel whole I feel home Track 06: When I Was A Young Man When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man, you know I still am Her kisses were wildfire, I lived in her hands When I was a young man I had me a friend She liked to cut class and she cut me with words She made me so high then kicked me in the dirt You better believe it, that girl she could hurt But by the way we made up, you know it was worth it When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man you know I still am She dressed just like midnight, she undressed like sand When I was a young man I had me a friend The girl liked to win, but she never would gloat She sang in the choir and hit every note When she told me she loved me, the words caught in her throat but it's not what you say, girl, it's all how you show it When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man you know I still am Her couch it was vintage, her clothes second-hand When I was a young man I had me a friend Her wine in the closet, she kept a gun in the drawer Each of them knew what the other was for When the cork popped, the gun shot, we were down on the floor That girl could blow kisses, ah, but sometimes she did more When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man you know I still am Now she's east of the Rockies, I'm west of Spokane When I was a young man I had me a friend She felt lost in the cities but loved it outside Liked to sleep when the sun's up, loved driving at night When she drove off you know it hurt more than my pride But eventually even the worst pain subsides When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man you know I still am Some days I still love her, I think she understands When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man I had me a friend When I was a young man you know I still am The best things in life sometimes we never plan When I was a young man I had me a friend Track 07: Outro In the future you will find me in some forest in the north. Like the thirteen year cicada, I will emerge from the earth. We will smile and talk politely as we see who we've become and I'll return to sleep alone, but I won't be the only one. Should we never be together? Would it were easy to say. Will I lie inside the earth alone at the end of all my days? For today, I think it's better that you turn and you are gone and allow me to remember, as I keep you close in song Track 08: When I Was Your All Falling fast from fear Falling for the forest The drums sound near My heart beating the chorus Gather here Closer draws the hour Let your mind grow clear Beside the virgin's bower And eyes, close your eyes and recall When I was your all Soothe your soul Snare the seething demons And I'll extol Your life and want for no one Control your doubt Prune the empty blackness And you will route The pain that came to transgress Lie and rest, in the feather down To wake with my kiss upon your garland crown And I know time trickles to a flood as we grow old And I know I'll stand alone when day is done and I am bone And I know the dreams you dreamt at night were not the same as mine Though I'll go, I hope you wake to find some inner peace of mind Wake my love The dawn is calling gently Take hold of My hand, follow intently Find the stream The stones it washes over Sit with me Beside the grass and clover Truly see My life laid bare before you With all esprit My love your soul to imbue And eyes, close your eyes and recall When I was your all Track 09: Poem II: The Shouldered Cornet The shouldered cornet breathes the sun Of wars long past, of those to come It glints and shines, reflecting light Onto the spoilt fields The shouldered cornet breathes new life Into the depths of timeless fights The men take up their needed arms And raise their trusted shields The shouldered cornet kissed the lips And felt the strength in fingertips Of oh so many gallant friends Whom it may kiss no more “Strike up! Strike out!”  the cornet cries, To sounds of battle in reply Yet over the cacophony Its powerful voice soars The shouldered cornet passes on From fallen friend with outstretched arms And each new master knows its worth Drawing it up in kind The shouldered cornet knows no songs Save those of loss, of husbands gone Of brothers, sons who gave their souls But linger in the mind The shouldered cornet rests each night And sleeps to call out to the sight Of dawn upon the pitch below But for now is at rest So when you hear the cornet call Take up your arms! And above all Fight with honor, for in the its cry You and I Oh, You and I You and I are so blessed Track 10: The Albatross > Flying The Albatross I was born at sea, I call no land my home No king and no country, the sea spray soaks into my bones I have no love of quays, I was born to tame the waves I was born at sea, and I will live here all my days I have no port of call, I was made for open air I fear no man nor beast, I fear no pirate nor corsair My men, they sound the drums, my men they keep time with the oars The ocean calls to me, and there is so much to explore 'Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin 'Til you came down, to curse me from within 'Til I came across my albatross We were two months at sea, hundreds of leagues beyond the strands The lookout called to me, the spyglass shaking, shaking in his hands Your raft adrift and you, a small and comely, lonely thing I mounted the rescue, brought you aboard, wet, shivering I looked into your eyes, your gaze was pure, your blue eyes held A quiet hushed the deck, a stirring I had never felt I wrapped you in my coat, gave you my quarters for to rest To have survived, crew said, you must be good and truly blessed 'Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin 'Til you came down, to curse me from within 'Til I came across my albatross The wind, it left our sails, it would seem we were becalmed I heard the singing whales, lending a voice to my alarm When you arose that night, you found me standing at the bow The focsle quiet, still, you took my arm and touched my brow I had a sailor's heart, no woman e'er meant much to me My love for balingers, carracks, picards, longships, and galleys Your touch was something new, light as snowfall in the air I felt such love for you, I knew of nothing to compare 'Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin 'Til you came down, to curse me from within 'Til I came across my albatross The days marched on no change, since you arrived no wind in air No fish, no birds, no life, just water, water everywhere It began with a hush, a murmur lingered under deck That you had brought this pain, and you would leave us all a wreck The panic grew and swelled until it reached a fever pitch They asked, "What awful hell sent you our captain to bewitch?" I called for calm, reason, I swore you meant none of them ill They shouted mutiny, they called for both our blood to spill They tied us to the mast, the crossbow quarrels taught and cocked They asked what words we'd say, we never spoke, our pale eyes locked And as they loosed, you changed, the rope fell from you to the ground And as you flew away, your beating wings the only sound Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin Til you came down, to curse me from within Til I came across my albatross I was born at sea, and I will live here all my days Flying I am flying, flying Oh mother, look at me now I am flying, flying Oh mother, look at me now Oh, I know I fell so hard (for you) I know I fell so far (from you) But now I'm flying, flying Oh father, look at me now I am flying, flying Oh father, look at me now Love isn't always what it seems And I fell out of love when you weren't in my dreams But now I'm flying, flying Oh lover, look at me now I am flying, flying Oh lover, look at me now Track 11: A True Love Song Can we just get serious for a moment? Can we talk about the elephant in the room? I know that you're not one for confrontation but the train's leaving the station and I too am leaving soon. You're the one who keeps her feelings locked up while I spill mine out, glass marbles in the sun and when you share they're from your measuring cup while I pluck mine for a close-up and examine every one. Look into my eyes. This is the time where you and I decide we're gonna last, decide the past is past and we're still in it. Can you tell me again what you were thinkin' when you said this ship is sinkin' and you smashed the boiler room You know that that's no way to solve our problems, but if you try to let the light in I can work it out with you. I know well that we are so magnetic, push and pull so energetically depending on the day. I love you, I'm unapologetic and there is no anesthetic for the hurt when you're away. Look into my eyes. This is the time where you and I decide we're gonna last, decide the past is past and we're still in it. Let's forget about who didn't do what and when. Let's drop the tally of which wrong was done to whom. That was then, years are past, and we're much older; summer's gone and winter's colder but my love for you still blooms. Do you remember the first date we shared together: The sunset on the water and the songs I played for you? You watched my hands, I watched the smile in your eyes and now the songs that I devise I sing to show my love for you. Look into my eyes. This is the time where you and I decide we're gonna last, decide the past is past and we're still in it. Track 12: Across The World What would you call a man lying in bed with your name in his head and the words to a book he never read out to you? What would you do, if all that you knew was you planted your heart but nothing ever grew, if nothing took root? And where would you go, if all left to show after four years of dinners and movies and shows and drives through the snow and drives through the woods and everything good in the touch of his hand was the face of a man -- just the face of a man and a feeling you once but no more understand what excited you so? How would you sleep in a foreign city if the stars in your sky when you look up at night weren't the ones from your birth, and the last place on earth that you thought you would miss was the same place you'd inked on the skin of your wrist? And who do you kiss? Do her lips taste like wine or do they taste like his? Do the boys wish to know you by heart or by bed? Do you ever instead think of a life you gave up for a life, think of the man who wished you for his wife? Track 13: How Old male: how old, how old, will I live, then die alone how old, how old, when they finally carve my stone I'll be holding you tonight but my soul's out on the road how old, how old, will I live, then die alone female: how long, how long, will you keep singing this song how long, how long, 'til you see that I'm the one I've been working in the field, and you're my burning sun so how long, how long, will you keep singing this song chorus: Take me down, I was selfish when you were around string me up by my feet, oh oh oh oh oh Talk me down, I'm standing too high above ground You're the only friend I see male: I've never known someone that I could call my own I'm just someone that everyone I've known's outgrown the thread has all come apart from every quilt I've sewn I've never known someone that I could call my own female: but don't you see, the love I give to you is free there are no strings, no wires no one's pulling me I'll give you all I have, you're all I live and breathe you gotta love yourself, before you can love me chorus Track 14: Love Anytime Sometimes I dream if we'd still be the same If we lived and we loved in some long ago age Well I knew when I met you I'd love you always And I know I'll be with you for all of my days What if we lived in fifteenth century Outside of Versailles or in Rome, Italy Where we'd listen to poets and meet DaVinci But I don't speak the language, it's not meant to be Maybe in England we could be amazed When young Oscar Wilde was still writing plays But the streets and air were so caked in pollution I'm not sure I'd love to live through revolution Sometimes I dream if we'd still be the same If we lived and we loved in some long ago age Well I knew when I met you I'd love you always And I know I'll be with you for all of my days New Year's, 1920 out on the east coast I'd wear tailored suits and I'd buy you fur coats But you had little voice and you hadn't won the vote So maybe the '20s aren't when I'd love most The '30s if wall street pulled me to the ground And we stood in the soup line that stretched through the town Well I'd love you the same, but it's too much to ask For your love to drink wine from the dry grapes of wrath, no, no The '60s were wild, could be we'd begin With love in the air but a war we couldn't win And when men are condemned by the shade of their skin I'd much rather, much rather be loving the person within Sometimes I dream if we'd still be the same If we lived and we loved in some long ago age Well I knew when I met you I'd love you always And I know I'll be with you for all of my days Track 15: The Ones We Are I remember you were smiling As we travelled up the coast When the train pulled in I kissed your hand Met your eyes and pulled you close You were flying down a mountain The wind was whipping at your clothes The one I took adventures with Was the girl I loved the most But if you spend too much time Thinking about where it all went wrong You might forget the ones we are Are not the things that we have done And you would laugh at the jokes that we'd tell, though you might be the only one And that alone would have been enough for me I captured you with words I'm in the pictures you have drawn Both allow us to relive the past When the past itself is gone They put you in the movies They put your sister in songs But I wrote this one for you Maybe she'll help you sing along You always meet a deadline Grit is written on your face The eleventh hour came and went But you always won the race But if you spend too much time Thinking about where it all went wrong You might forget the ones we are Are not the things that we have done And you came through at the ends of the nights when I was rising with the sun And that alone would have been enough for me There was the time it all came down The sadness scarred across your face When the refuge of your bed Became a trusted hiding place And when you're wrestling with your demons There is a line you can't retrace Between who you were and how you are When you're so forcibly displaced But if you spend too much time Thinking about where it all went wrong You might forget the ones we are Are not the things that we have done And you would cry for ones that you loved when there was nothing to be done And that alone would have been enough for me You told me casting off your anchors Doesn't mean you're lost at sea Shallow waters and calm skies Won't make a sailor out of me You put a lock upon your memories And swallowed down the only key You bought a ticket back to Kansas Sat beneath the family tree But if you spend too much time Thinking about where it all went wrong You might forget the ones we are Are not the things that we have done And you knew what I meant when I said I always wanted to be a Tenenbaum And that alone would have been enough for me Track 16: A Way To Be I got the car packed and followed the sun I drove out west where there's work to be done The miles came rolling down Like the water in your eyes when I was leaving town You told me how you loved me but could not remember why I said, "that's one hell of a way to tell a friend of yours goodbye" I wished you well and held you close against my chest just one more time Before you went back to being yours and I went back to being mine I got the mountains and the evergreen trees Might say I got what I wanted but it wasn't what I need Still, there's more to me than you, yeah, and I'm starting to see A way, a way, a way to be I reached the place where I was headed after 27 hours I felt anxious and alive like Roland staring at his tower From amidst a rolling sea made up of perfect blood red flowers As the memories of you came pouring over like a shower Like the waver in your voice when you were too upset for words The glimmer in your eyes when you told me things no one's heard Your arm around my waist when you were walking at my side and the way your mouth would taste when I knew you in the night I don't want to spend my time kissing girls that I don't love I don't want to spend my life thinking about the man I was I just want to build toward something that means something with someone A way, a way, a way to be I got the mountains and the evergreen trees Might say I got what I wanted but it wasn't what I need Still, there's more to me than you, yeah, and I'm starting to see A way, a way, a way to be Track 17: Dreaming Of You She was lying in bed as the day broke outside The sunlight sliding up her leg like the rising tide She's my blonde haired baby with those big blue Bambi eyes Got what I need between her ears, what I want between her thighs As she woke she gently spoke, "Boy, ain't this a surprise, I was just dreaming of you." Well, I ain't no money man, but I sure to like to boast I got the best damn woman on the Western Coast She's an equal and a partner though you know she's never wrong She may not know how to play, but she always sings along She knows where everything goes and I know right where I belong And it's right here dreaming of you I was driving down to Lincoln from Washington state I was south of Omaha, headed down the interstate Well, the road is getting long, and the night is getting late I had all the windows down just so I could stay awake Well, the miles keep on tickin', and you know that I can't wait 'Til I'm back home dreaming with you I went and told my sister and I went and told my friends That I found the girl I'm gonna love and cherish 'til the end Well, my sister she's a skeptic, and my friends, yeah, they are too But one look into my eyes and they knew that it was true Life is more than just the back swing, boy, you've got to follow through and I'm always dreaming of you I travelled out to see your parents and I asked them for their time Said, "I've got a little bit of something big that's been on my mind." I told them that I love you, how I think that you're divine I asked them for their blessing, they said, "Now, boy, that'd be just fine." Your dad hugged me, your mom kissed me, then they sent back down the line Where I'm always dreaming of you So I'm out on open road and I'm heading back West To the one who gives me reason for the beating in my chest She's my best friend in the world, she's the ruling queen She's the spark of a match, and I'm the gasoline And I've got to say by now she knows exactly what I mean When I say I'm always dreaming of you Track 18: Touch I drove with both hands on the wheel Makes all the difference in the world to me The birds flocking north, you were headed down south Riding out on a warm spring breeze So I drop you off at the airport Watch until they lock the doors Oh, I hope when you touch back down, You find what you're looking for I take the pictures off the dusty shelves Stick them face down in the bottom drawer Sure, the day might come when I pull them back out Or a day when I won't care no more So I drop myself into bed My blood is ice cold and my thoughts off shore Oh, I hope when I touch back down, I won't love you anymore Track 19: God And Broken Glass You were standing in the alley crying into your phone. I was lying on the bed staring at the white wall, I was feeling pretty alone. You're so very penitent. Your eyes were red and puffy. I was saying, "It's alright, it's alright dear," but I was feeling pretty empty. Broken glass at your feet, and God in the sky. Can you tell me, does it still leave room for you and I? String the lights out on the deck. Put the angel on the tree. Find a reason to forgive. Find a reason to forget about me. I said a prayer for the hungry, dropped a dollar in the basket for the weak. Mail off a Hallmark card to you, Signed "Your Friend," instead of "Love," because that's all you need. If God is in our lives, broken glass at your feet, can you tell me does it still leave room for you and me? Track 20: Poem III: Sleep When you lie down to sleep Do you ever wonder If the person you're thinks about thinks of you When you're alone and dream of whom you care about Is she also alone, and dreaming of you Do you sleep just to dream her And wake just to see her Does she make every day you are with her seem new And when you sleep to dream do you ever hope She's also alone, and thinking of you Track 21: Soldiering On There was rain on the porch swing and rain on my boots and the hood to my jacket was drawn when I saw you come skipping your way up the street, you were smiling, I'm soldiering on. You gave me a carving you found on the road and you gave me a jar full of sand from a beach far off somewhere that I'll never see. I was here and I gave you my hand. I was a braggart, you were a rogue: the best two this town's ever seen. I was a drinker, and you liked to smoke but between us we kept our souls clean. There was sun on the water and sun on your skin, the evening came on as I strummed. Your hair caught the last light, your eyes caught the stars, you voice caught the tune while I hummed. You gave me a kiss and loaned me your heart and took me down into your bed. I left town the next day crossing fingers for you, you crossed me right off your list instead. I was a braggart, you were a rogue: the best two this town's ever seen. I was a drinker, and you liked to smoke but between us we kept our souls clean. There was dirt in the phone line and under my nails when the fighting and sighing was through. You had ice in your veins and stones in your eyes. I was out cold and dreaming of you. You gave me some heartbreak, I gave you some too when the Spring came and you were withdrawn. I was always so faithful, 'least when you were around, you were crying, I'm soldiering on. You played the liar, and I played the fool: the best two this town's ever seen. Once or twice we forgot we were on the same side, but between us we kept our souls clean. There was rain on the porch swing and rain on my boots and the hood to my jacket was drawn when I saw you come skipping your way up the street, you were smiling, I'm soldiering on.