Well to begin with I should mention that when I was a little kid I heard Tiny Tim on the radio.I also saw Tiny Tim on Laugh In.So for some reason or other I thought if I learned the Ukulele it would make me great.Well it was fun and I really enjoyed learning these songs and I have to admit this CD doesn't sound completely like my others.The Heavy Metal Ukulele song on this CD I came up with as an original idea and it is a Ukulele that is being played into a microphone but though it sounds electric it isn't the first time anyone has done this.I was told that Tiny Tim had a Heavy Metal Band.So about the CD it is a bunch of songs that I learned to play with some finger picking pulling notes out of the chords and playing kind of bluegrass style on a Baratone Ukulele.A Baratone Ukulele is more like the Guitar.It's tuning is similar to the bottom 4 strings on the Guitar which are the notes D G B & E.With the old folk songs I've added some of your favorite ART PAUL songs.It was originally ment to be a little cassette tape I was going to sell as I toured the country playing my Ukulele but I never really decided to tour and the market for the cassette tape was bottoming out at the time.Alot of these songs I had been practicing in the Mountains of Colorado and if you live near Boulder you might have seen me one day playing on the street there.I also played I like my mother at an open mic somewhere near where me and a priest friend where camping.Well that covers most of the songs and the ones later on the CD are kind of an attempt to record a Country cassette but their more like a Country Novelty songs.They Won't Play This On The Country Western Radio was inspired by a friend of mine who plays Blue Grass on the a local radio station here where I live who said that's really not country and all The Comercial Country stations that really play Country Pop that sounds more and more like Country Rock everyday.How does the solo act get his country song on the radio ? So here is another ART PAUL SCHLOSSER CD with country and bluegrass styles of music in it and you wonder will there be more country and bluegrass in the future ? Should I say the title of one of the songs Neither Either or nor or just say only time will tell ? Hey check out the lyrics to the songs: 1. Tom Dooley 1 & II Hang down your head, Tom Dooley Hang down your head and cry Hang your head, Tom Dooley Poor boy you're bound to die You killed poor Laurie Foster You know it's not a lie You killed poor Laurie Foster Poor boy you're bound to die You tried to get away with it But you know you couldn’t hide You tried to get away with it They caught you poor boy you're bound to die Di-di-di, Di-di, Di-di Di-di-di-di I don’t know(laughter) I got to start over I’m sorry Hang down your head, Tom Dooley Hang down your head and cry Hang your head, Tom Dooley Poor boy you're bound to die You shot poor Laurie Foster You know it's not a lie You shot poor Laurie Foster Poor boy you're bound to die You tried to run away with it But you know you couldn’t hide You tried to get away with it Poor boy you're bound to die 2.Silent Night I This next song is for people that appreciate ah Well they appreciate ah Well they might like this one A lot of people might like it I don't know Especially people that don't like any music They like this one especially It's called silent night Okay here you go 3. Venison Christmas & Silent Night 2 It was Late one December night When My Dad saw a real bright red light So he thought it just might Be a reindeer in flight So he pull out his gun And he bagged him one We’re gonna have a venison Christmas this year Rudolph on the grill We’re gonna have a venison Christmas this year You can come on over too Well some people like to eat turkey And some people like to eat ham Some people like beef jerky And some people like eat spam I don’t know what your serving But we’re having venison Silent night, holy night, All is calm, all is bright Round yon virgin mother and Child. Holy Infant, so tender and mild, Sleep in heavenly peace, Sleep in heavenly peace. Silent night, holy night, Shepherds quake at the sight; Glories stream from heaven afar, Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia! Christ the Savior is born, Christ the Savior is born! Silent night, holy night, Son of God, love’s pure light; Radiant beams from Thy holy face With the dawn of redeeming grace, Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth, Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth. 4.Santa Claus Twist You go Ho ! Ho ! Ho ! And you go,go,go Doing the Santa Claus Twist You get a red suit And you get your gal(guy) one to Doing the Santa Claus Twist You roll,roll,roll like you've got a big belly Dust off your clothes like you've just come from the chimney Take a chance Do this dance Doing the Santa Claus Twist You get a little red hat With a little white ball Doing the Santa Claus Twist All of a sudden The reindeer you call Doing the Santa Claus Twist Dasher and Dancer,Prancer and Vixen Comet and Cuped,Downer and Blisten Take a Chance Do this dance Doing the Santa Claus Twist 5. Shall The Circle Be Unbroken I was standing by the station On a cold and cloudy day When I saw the hearse come rollin' For to take my mother away. Shall the circle be unbroken? By and by lord, by and by, There's a better home a-waitin' In the sky lord, in the sky. Well I told the undertaker: Undertaker, please drive slow, For this body you are haulin' Lord, I hate to see her go Shall the circle be unbroken? By and by lord, by and by, There's a better home a-waitin' In the sky lord, in the sky Well I followed close behind her, Tried to hold up and be brave, But I could not hide my sorrow When they laid her in the grave Shall the circle be unbroken? By and by lord, by and by, There's a better home a-waitin' In the sky lord, in the sky 6. By By Ba-Baby By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by I hate to let you go But I know it’s so And Darling Oh I’ll miss you By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by It’s time like these That I wish please Reality Just wouldn’t be By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by Oh send me a kiss You know I'll miss Your warm sweet lips My Darling By By Ba-baby By by ba-baby By By ba-baby By By Well you know darling along time ago I knew you Or least I swore I did We were walking across the bridge and one of the panels cave in I fell through it and in the river and in the mud You laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and well you were ugly And anyways your name is sue or jane or was it carla And you know all those good times we had together when I borrowed all your money Then I never paid you back and I wanted to but you know I couldn't Because I thought you were someone else and I had to avoid you for awhile Then you got rich and forgave me Well you know time goes on By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by Yeah I hate to let you go But I know it’s so And Darling Oh I’ll miss you Besides I have to act like I don't know who you are Because I don't want to be arrested for owing money By By Ba-baby By by ba-baby By By ba-baby By By It’s time like these That I wish please Reality Just wouldn’t be Yeah By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by ba-baby By by By by ba-by By by ba-by By by ba-by By by Oh send me a kiss You know I'll miss Your warm sweet lips My Darling Yeah By By By by By by By By 7. Hi How Are You Hi, how are you Hi, how are you Hi how are you Good to meet you Good to meet you I like friends, you like friends, we all like friends I need friends, you need friends, we all need friends You ain’t got no one for your friend Come on over and visit me will be friends 8. Skip To My Lou skip, skip, skip to my Lou, Skip, skip, skip to my Lou, Skip, skip, skip to my Lou, Skip to my Lou, my darlin' Lost my partner, What'll I do? Lost my partner, What'll I do? Lost my partner, What'll I do? Skip to my lou, my darlin' Skip to my Lou, my darlin'. Skip, skip, skip to my Lou, Skip, skip, skip to my Lou, Skip, skip, skip to my Lou, Skip to my Lou, my darlin'. Little red wagon, Paint it blue Little red wagon, Paint it blue Little red wagon, Paint it blue 9. Purple Bananas On The Moon There's purple bananas on the moon I'm not quite sure but they said it was true Go there and find out for myself Don't have the time or the wealth Read a book about it too They say books can lie to you Purple bananas on the moon Purple bananas on the moon Besides they convinced me "ride this flying horse" "Best we've got but we'll sell it of course" I know what your saying; the horse is a goat The price I paid, how could I say no Besides they convinced me it really has wings I'm going to fly to the moon, eat purple bananas, and sing Purple bananas on the moon Purple bananas on the moon 10. My Cat Was Taking A Bath 1.I was riding home late one night When there in my house I saw a light And when I got inside Right before my very eyes Chorus:My cat was taking a bath My cat was taking a bath It was a quarter to 3 And I don't believe My cat was taking a bath 2.Well maybe I had something to drink Or maybe I just couldn't quite think But my ma saw it to And she said of coarse it's true(go back to chorus) 11. Red River Valley From this valley they say you are leaving Gonna miss your bright eyes and sweet smile For they say you are taking the sunshine That brightens pathways awhile CHORUS: So come and sit by my side, if you love me Do not hasten to bid me adieu And remember that Red River Valley And the cowboy that loved you so true But if you truly do love me And you meant it truer than true Then why are you leaving this valley And making my heart so blue Well somewhere the sky is sunny There is blue sky all about But in Mudville it is raining For the might Casey struck out So come and sit by my side, if you love me Do not hasten to bid me adieu And remember that Red River Valley And the cowboy that loved you so true 12. I Like My Mother/Cockles and Mussels There's candy Icecream Chocalate Good dreams And I like my Mother ! Mothers are sweet Mothers are nice They help you Give you good advice And they make you cookies ! I like my Mother ! I like my Mother ! I like my Mother ! I Like my Mother ! I really Like My Mother ! Theres Uncles Cousins Sisters Brothers Fathers And I like my Mother ! And I pray God You'll let my Mother live a thousand years So I don't have to get a job or do anything And I can just live with my mother ! I like my Mother ! I like my Mother ! I like my Mother ! I like my Mother ! I really Like My Mother ! In Dublin's fair city Where girls are so pretty Twas there that I first met Sweet Molly Malone As she wheeled her wheelbarrow Through streets broad and narrow Mussels, Cockles and mussels, alive, alive oh Alive, alive oh, alive, alive oh, Crying, Cockles and mussels, alive, alive oh Now she was a fishmonger And sure twas no wonder For so were her mother Ad father before And they each Wheeled their barrows Through streets broad and narrow Crying, Cockles and mussels, alive, alive oh Well She died of a fever And no one could save her And that was the end Of sweet Molly Malone Now she Wheels her wheel barrow Through Heaven's Gate narrow Crying, Cockles and mussels, alive, alive oh 13. Heavy Metal Ukulele Heavy metal ukulele Can't you dig it Baby Don't it drive you zany It's heavy metal ukulele Every time I play they always pay me And all the ladies they just go crazy You know why ? I'll tell you why Because I play heavy metal ukulele 14. Boyfriend’s Mean She’s really pretty Boyfriend’s mean She’s really pretty Boyfriend’s mean I like her She's my type I want to date her I'd rather save my life She’s really pretty Boyfriend’s mean She’s really pretty Boyfriend’s mean She calls me up Late at night Says let’s go out I’d rather save my life She’s really pretty Boyfriend’s mean She’s really pretty Boyfriend’s mean Boyfriend Boyfriend Boyfriend Boyfriend Boyfriend Boyfriend’s mean 15. Misery Loves Company 1.What are you doing tonight ? Whatever it is I guess, it's alright Cause I learned along time ago not to fight Especially with a woman with a knife Chorus:And I still love you dear Though we've been going out for 16 million years Oh your ugly,you sing bad,you wear a wig and drink beer I've got worts,I stink,I'm blind,deaf and I can't hear So I guess that we belong together Cause realisticly you and me couldn't find anyone other Oh I'll stick to you,you stick to me Cause you know misery loves company 2.And if you ever decide to leave me Well you know your just gonna grieve me Oh it's not that I really love you It's just that once your gone there will be no one to argue 16. They Won’t Play This on the Country Western Radio They won't play this on the Country Western radio It's not what they call Country I don't wear no cowboy hat And I didn't send them any money I didn't send them any money I come from the north And I don't drink beer And besides all these other things They probable think that I'm queer Probable think that I'm queer Just cause I wear pink Ain't that make you think Everybody's judging everyone And sometimes it's in the name of God's Son Sometimes it's in the name of God's Son Maybe it's because of the kazoo ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Well even if they don't play this on the Country Western station It's not gonna bother me That's not how I want to succeed I don't want to succeed by conformity I don't want to succeed by conformity I wear the clothes I want to wear And I cut my hair the way I want to cut my hair Well if they don't play this on the Country Western radio You know where they can go You know where they can go 17.No Recognizes Me Anymore No one recognizes me anymore I used to be a famous star Playing at all the honky tonks and bars But now it's hard to get in the door No one recognizes me anymore Yeah I was on TV and the radio I almost made some real dough But now it seems I'm getting poor No one recognizes me anymore I said no one recognizes I'm not wearing any disguises No one recognizes me anymore No one recognizes No one even trieses No one recognizes me anymore Well the invited me to all the parties 18. Neither Either, Or Nor Well you say you don't know I don't know Either I knew a girl named Either But I didn't really know her I didn't know her sister Neither Yeah I didn't know Either One day I tried to call up Either But it wasn't Either It wasn't her sister Neither Yeah it wasn't Neither It was their neighbor Julie Well that's a different story Do you want to know more Tell you about their Mother Or Their brother Nor Yeah I didn't know their Mother Or Their brother Nor I didn't try to ignore Their Mother Or Their brother Nor Just didn't know either Yeah I didn't know neither So it was a typical case of Neither, Either, Or, Nor Neither, Either, Or, Nor Neither, Either, Or, Nor Well They moved last week I'm hanging out with Julie They moved last week Well maybe they write me But I'd rather doubt it There's no doubt about it I didn't know Either Yeah I didn't know Neither I didn't know their Mother Or Their brother Nor It was a typical case of Neither, Either, Or, Nor Neither, Either, Or, Nor Neither, Either, Or, Nor 19. Angeline Angeline Angeline Like Jello green With whip cream I love my Angeline Angeline Angeline She is a dream And a Queen My Angeline Angeline Angeline A gave her a ring But she sold it for the cash Angeline Angeline My skin just turned green Your love gives me a rash I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat to your house I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat when I saw you already had a spouse Angeline Angeline What does this mean ? Hey I'm in doubt ? Angeline Angeline What does this mean ? Will we still go out ? I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat and there was a hole in the boat I was paddling paddling paddling paddling my boat blub blub blub blub 20. I’m Just Another Lost Island in the Sea I'm just another lost island in the sea No one comes over and no one writes me No Baby on the phone On weekends I'm all alone I'm just another lost island in the sea If there was away to unlock this lonely heart,I must of lost the key I'ld write Ann Landers But I spent the money at Colonel Sanders I'm just another lost island in the sea And just like Jesus, I want to say:"My God! My God! Why has Thou forsaken me ?" Cause though I pray I end up lonely anyway I'm just another lost island in the sea But I still smile,so you won't see my misery But though I smile and fake I can't hide this heartache I'm just another lost island in the sea Won't you bring your safety boat and come and rescue me ? Send me a Life Saver Cherry is my favorite flavor I'm just another lost island in the sea Uncharted,off the map so no one visits me But if you drift my way Won't you spend a day I'm just another lost island in the sea 21. Girlfriend with a Car I want a girlfriend with a car I want a girlfriend with a car I want a girlfriend with a car She can drive me, we’ll go really far I don’t care if she’s pretty But gosh I hope she’s pretty But even if she’s not pretty She just got to drive me from city to city You know if she’s got money If she’s got money I try to tell jokes and be real funny If she’s got money I want a girlfriend with a car I want a girlfriend with a car I want a girlfriend with a car She can drive me, we’ll go really far You know if she’s got money If she’s got money I try to tell jokes and be real funny If she’s got money And when we’re married and have kids When we’re married and have kids When we’re married and have kids We’ll bring them up in the Taxi biz I want a girlfriend with a car I need a girlfriend with a car I love a girlfriend with a car She can drive me, we’ll go really far 22. 2nd Coming Boogie He's coming back ! He's coming back ! He's coming back ! He's coming back ! Are you ready ? Are you ready ? Are you ready ? Are you ready ? 23. 3 Note Song There's only 3 notes In this song And I wish that it was Just a little more long You might think I'm funny You might just yawn But if I was on TV I'd probably get gong You might be smart You might be strong But if you said you're God You're probably wrong Cause one day you'll die And then you'll be dead And no one will remember A word you said So you better get ready Have your bed made Or you won't get none of that Heavenly lemonade That's all there is There ain't no more So before you leave Don't slam the door 24. 10 Oclock News Everybody wants to see Who’s going to be seen Who’s going to be nice Who’s going to be mean Hey you gotta be careful This ain’t a dream Crime maybe fun, but jail isn’t keen Everybody wants to know Who’s going to be in the show Will you get drunk Will you lose all your dough When it’s time to go Where will you go Will you be on the front page of the paper come tomorrow Everybody’s watching Who’ll be the next one They just want to know Who’s going to be the next victim How far will you go On that double dare Will you be the top moron of the year Will you be the King Will you be the Star Will you be the leading roll In tomorrow’s nightmare Everybody wants to know How far you’ll really go Do you gotta a conscious Do you gotta a soul